, , , , , ,

I should be playing but the musics not coming, the fingers are tapping but it doesn't sound like drumming, no strings around so this cannot be strumming!
I've given you cause to weep! A sadness given unwilling. Lost empty souls make give the race, heed to hills put the mask of science on my face.
World now obscure obsessed by strange mirrors that make oneself famous but still won't give you free dinners!

Everything has its price, Magic certainly science especially.

Let me dream of you for you!
We go away; places where nothing is real!
Black and white media blurred with colour painted by the third eye.
Black as ravens wings.
This science is full of smoke and mirrors
Old man then, legend now, talks slow with firm authority. Watch him on a mood box waiting for something that will never come!
I burn within, an acid sickness that makes me feel ancient, I take my leave of the world. We go away where nothing is real without leaving this room, plug in turn on tune in fade away! Long to lay upon green grass on a summers evening watching the sun fall into shade with the scent of cut grass fresh on the evening air. I strain to listen to the songs of birds. Memories of green, memories of childhood days where breathing was easy and the dust not so toxic.
I do not know where these words are taking me.
Think too much.
Is that possible?
I do not know where these words are talking me!

I wish once more not the first time not the last to look upon sky's beautiful to behold.

I have so many longings, to write letters, to discuss, to talk, to write, to sing, to laugh, all that is is now memory, I heard birds sing long ago, now their songs fill my mind along with the shadows and the light and the dark and the world it turns, I can feel it.
I can feel it.
I have been burying bones again.
How many? I will not say.
Are they all my doing? I am not allowed to say.

I talk too much.

And I do not talk at all.

So many ghosts! If you listen closely you can hear them all chatter. Or is that the chatter of the mood box from the rooms next door, hear the laughter ignore the tears, block out the screams the shouts the fears. They don't exist! All is laughter joy and light, 21st century living, everything equal all is broken, everyone equal we gave up the right! No need to be anything else, the newsreader blimp passed by overhead, things looking good, that what she said. All blonde fresh ruby lipped smiling, eyes bright and blue voice so beguiling.

Confusion when we let the words out, let them go to do their own business and the rest of the day I don't know how much I love the way you can get the chance to see my friends. But I cannot believe that this was the best thing to do or say, I have no willpower! Especially when the milk bar delivers, all manner of foods and refreshments, tasty and so filling.
They come to me then! Dine with me as if they were images on the walls.
I tell them everything and they tell me nothing but the fact that I have no clue who they are! Now, yes, now, I am burying the bones in soft damp earth and their ghosts curse me. Tell me I know nothing at all.
I have no idea where these words are taking me!

Did I say that I used to write letters?
I will again, I have a need to do so, I will when I have finished.
What am I doing here, why am I doing this?

Is my mood box faulty! I turn it up to four, a seldom used wavelength, barely remember when I used it before.

I was lying in a field.
Then I was digging, digging, digging, digging again, I was laying in a field.
I remember Daisies under a blue sky with bird song and screams filling the air.

Dirt under my fingernails on a dark and rainy night.

Why do the dead keep laughing? I feel cold and the night mocks me whilst the day curses me with screams and pain.

I do not know where these words are taking me.

I have reached an abyss and all things seem to pause.

Speak softly to the ears of history.

Love is a gentle touch laced with delicate poison.

Sex, blood and death
Over time
As an institution

Page after page.

The rain continues to fall
Watching masks
On the wall
I smile
Returned by 26 faces
All have the same voice.

Word upon word
Page after page
We watch him close
Feel his rage
The room a cell
In which he remains
His mind is a cage
Containing many pains.

Who watches him?
I do!
Does anyone listen?
I do!
Will you ever release him?
We wish for you to join him.

There was a knock at the the door!
Uniforms, two, perhaps more.
They command, I obey, stand in the corridor out of the way. Looking this way and that, so many people faces afraid expressions haggard pale full of fear, as I stand them before them, they look away from my eyes, close doors look them with heavy metal sighs.
Behind in my room the noise of horror and disgust, could they be caused by my actions? Have I malfunctioned? Have I lost human trust?
I turn and see what once was that now is a heap on a chair, so many things happen at once.
Bright light.

And then I am not there!

The mood box plays on eventually fading into silence.